Tuesday, April 27, 2010

It's a strange feeling to walk into a place and know that it's your last day... know that you might not see these people again, but that they have changed your life.
Today is it. My last day at my internship in Lima. I will deeply miss the people, the place, and the community. I've learned more from them then they could from me and I am grateful for that.

As for this week--- I will be starting that process of packing. I will be throwing things away, recycling old clothes and remembering a lot. This weekend was the start of alot of tears... but now that I know that-- I guess I'm prepared for it. :)

Blessings of Peace to you all--
Only a few more posts from me....


Monday, April 26, 2010

The Busiest of Weekends

One more “free” weekend left. It’s strange to think about where time goes after you hit a certain point. Last weekend I was busy working on things for my internship, planning bridal showers and finishing up last minute journals. This weekend— those particular events took place and at 11:00pm last night, I had nothing to do.

My weekend was filled with a lot of fun. From Friday night Live Band Karaoke to Saturday’s Ottawa River Clean-up and Sunday’s Shining Through party. I literally had a few minutes to breathe. But the best part, is that I was ok with that. I had fun this weekend, I spent time with friends and I cried (once again) over leaving this place that I’ve called home for the past 4 years.

Last night was my “last” Sunday Night Worship. This time the speakers were friends of mine talking about “senior reflections.” They talked about what they’ve learned, how they’ve grown and most of all a little advise. Some of it was funny, a lot of it was meaningful, and most of it hit home. My lovely friend Megan spoke of attempting to be content with uncertainty. Not knowing what she will be doing in a few weeks is terrifying, but she needs to also be able to live in the moment and not panic. Brendan, spoke of understanding everything that has brought you to the point where you are today… not just looking towards the future, but also acknowledging the people, circumstances and lessons that have gotten you where you are.

I’m not very good at “goodbyes.” I actually refuse to say them. My best friend moved to North Carolina and I always said that it was a “see you later,” not “goodbye.” But somehow when I looked around last night at the individuals in Chapel I realized that it was a goodbye for some of us. It has to be. I may not see these faces again, and that in its’ self is a bit sad. I received a letter yesterday from my lovely Shining Through-ers and one of the notes that hit me to the core said… “I hate that I’m writing this note… it means that I will be desperately missing you soon.” How true. I don’t think that people ever realize how much they impact my life… and with that small token of gratitude and love, I am forever affected.

So only a few more days left—and possibly a few more goodbyes.

Blessings of Peace-

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Final Journal...

As I was in my Field placement today I wrote my "final journal" for the class....

I thought it was alright, so I decided to share it with you--- since you have been on this journey with me. :)

There are so many things that I can say about my field placement. Almost all of them good, but there should always be some sort of constructive criticism, or just a little more advice.
When I picked the Department of Community Development I was walking into this placement with little understanding of what a city Community Development department does. It felt like I was walking in “blind.” After catching up on who is who in the department and what happens when—things started to pick up. I was involved in Press Conferences, press releases, workshops, board meetings, neighborhood meetings, implementation of new ideas and projects but most of all I was apart of a community of people that wanted to change their city. Whether or not they had different ideas, views, political agendas or backgrounds. I was a part of this community. Throughout the past 15ish weeks I was literally apart of community development.
After that first week, I chose my paper topic for capstone. I wanted to know the basics, what community development was, how it can be implemented, what jobs are available when working in this sort of department and I was flooded with books, journals, articles, blogs, and much more on different ideas of development with the community. After all of that I started to look at Community Development a bit differently. It is more than just neighborhoods, more than just nonprofits; it literally is about the people. Macro Social work is about the mass of people that want to see change.
I’ve learned so much over the past 15 weeks that I will always be thankful for. Whether it is learning about fundraising when researching for a workshop, or about property maintenance when going on a walk with one of the inspectors, there was a huge variety for me.


It's strange to think that this will be over on Tuesday of next week...

Blessings of Peace-

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I also encourage you to check out another Bloggers posts for April. Tasha is a Sophomore at Bluffton and has alot of really great things to say! :)
Living and Loving Life

One of my habits---

I love to read. Anything. Books, magazines, cereal boxes, flyers, etc. This list could go on and on. Recently I have picked up the book Eat Pray Love, which I have read before, but wanted to work my way through it again. Just the other day when it was 80 degrees outside, I picked up my book and magaznies and made my way out to the grass with a blanket. A friend of mine was already out there laying out in the sun. It was the greatest picture ever--- it was as if she was worshiping it. Here eyes closed, a smirk on her face and at peace sweating like crazy. :) I stopped next to her and dropped everything. I couldn't wait to lay there. As I stopped unfold the blankets I noticed a few things, student teachers walking back from school, students coming from class, some lucky ones that were done with class playing tennisball golf, and the individuals around me. We all looked at peace. I picked up my book, opened it to the 5 chapter and continued to read and read and read. I was in my heaven: sunshine, and books. :)

These next few weeks I will hopefully get to enjoy those two things a lot.

After an exciting and crazy semester, I like to think that I deserve these next two lazy weeks. :)

Blessings of Peace,

Monday, April 19, 2010

The beginning of the end…

Seriously, I told you back in the first blog of April that I apologize for the “sappy” blogs, but you have to expect this to come. =)

This past weekend was one where I didn’t sit down. Things are beginning to pick up on campus from events, to regularly scheduled friend time. My weekends start on Thursday Nights because Friday’s are my day off. =)
So, Thursday after dinner 5 friends got together to trek to the Whippy Dip in town! We actually took the LONG way, but we seemed to be ok with that. My camera became our entertainment and we took pictures, told stories from our day and laughed a lot. Friday morning, I was able to have my new “weekly” breakfast date with Janna, Derek, Jen and Joe. We spend our 7am morning with some Marbeck Breakfast and lots of laughs. After breakfast I wanted to jump back in bed, but it was so beautiful out, I took a little walk/run. I went to the nature preserve to walk around, soak up the sunshine and take a little time to reflect. I guess this past week I realized that the end of all this was coming up quick. It was the perfect way to kick off that realization of “the beginning of the end.” Friday night consisted of dinner with friends and then dancing!
On Saturday I was able to get off campus to attend an old friends wedding at a nearby town. My family drove over so it was nice to see them and watch someone dear to our hearts get married! Saturday night was filled with Hannah, and Megan time at the Flying J. We ordered pancakes, eggs, chicken fingers, and some water and just talked. What a blessing these women are in my life. =) From looking into the future, to listening to wedding plans, it was a night that was relaxing, but needed.

As I begin to make my way into my last full week of internship I feel refreshed and ready. Who knows if this feeling will last, but it sure does feel pretty good right now!

Enjoy the sunshine-
Blessings of Peace-

Thursday, April 15, 2010


Something that has been crossing my mind frequently is the idea of smells relating to memories. I think a lot of this is because Spring is here and flowers are popping up along with allergies for some people.
Yesterday I was walking out of my internship and laughed out loud because the weather and smell in the air reminded me of home. It was this warm breeze with a hint of lilac. I could close my eyes and picture sitting outside on my back steps. I got into my car and rolled down the window turned on the radio and started my drive back to Bluffton. Pulling off of the highway I caught the smell of gasoline from the tractor in front of me. I smiled as I thought back to the Shining Through Spring Break tour with a lot of stops being in gas stations for a regular fill up. Two days ago, the skies were clouded with a chance of rain… My gut reaction was to think about the days when I was 10 waiting for that one softball game to be cancelled so I could play in the rain… I call my best friend that morning to laugh about it. :)
The more I stopped to think about this idea of smells relating to memories, I started to question the sorts of smells that would relate me back to Bluffton in a few years. There will always be that distinct smell of Marbeck and Dining Services, but there will also be the smells of the first fall nights outside at the nature preserve. There will be the smell of the fresh cut grass on campus the week before May Day in preparation of the weekend full of activities. There will be the smell of popcorn that will relate back to The Shannon where we would get the deal on soda and a bucket of popcorn for the same price of the movie.

It’s strange what can trigger memories--- but this past week the smells have been doing that for me. :)

Blessings of Peace,

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The first of many Tears...

Well- granted, I know that I’ve cried before last night, but I’ll call the tears last night, the first because of Graduation. Sometimes the realization kicks in and I remember that I wont be at Bluffton next year. I won’t have to move back into a residence hall, I wont get to go through LDP the week before classes start, I wont have a Spring break trip for Shining Through again. Wow. I guess I’ve known this for an entire year, but sometimes the realization kicks in.

I know that I am going to love Pittsburgh…. It’s a new adventure, just like Bluffton was, but this place has been my home for the past 4 years. I’ve planned, attended and ran events. I’ve watched my closest friends in musicals, bands, presentations, worship, and classroom discussions. I’ve grown in my faith, beliefs and values. What kind of place can give you all of that?? I am thankful and blessed to have a place like Bluffton to refer back to, it’s a community.

So—after my first tears shed for the upcoming Graduation, I still have this sadness in the back of my mind, but I also have excitement. I get to watch my best friends walk across that stage and get their diploma, I get to watch my closest friend give her MayDay Queen Speech Saturday morning, I get to chat with old friends that will come back to watch graduations, and I get to sit in my room with my 3 closest friends the day of graduation to laugh, grumble, make jokes, and even tear up about leaving this place.

So--- Here’s to the first of many tears---

Blessings of Peace-

Monday, April 12, 2010

My weekend...

A Friday night babysitting, a Saturday full of Janna and Anna, and a Sunday with an 8 hour car ride. What a weekend. I can tell you that it was crazy busy, but worth it.

On Friday night, Hannah, Megan, Ashley and I got our "quality" time in. We were babysitting Hannah's BASIC leaders 8 month old daughter Teaghen. How beautiful she is. We dealt with the crying, changing, feeding, and playing. (Some were better than others) ;) It was nice to get away from the residence halls and internships to sit with my girlfriends and chat about what we are thinking about these next few weeks.

Saturday was my day date with Janna. We drove to walmart talking about Ireland, last year, what is happening in our lives now that we rarely see each other, her wedding... the list could go on and on. It was well worth it. In the afternoon we pulled down her mattresses from her beds and watched movies and did homework sitting on the floor. Best decision ever. We laughed so hard that day and I was reminded how much I miss that girl. I can't wait to see her get married in July but most of all can't wait for our friendship to grow!

Sunday= Shining Through= long drives= worshiping= friends= laughter!

It was a long weekend, but one that will always remind me of Bluffton! :)

Blessings of Peace,

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

I apologize in advance....

It is April 7th. In exactly 1 month from today I will have been through our graduation "practice" walk through. I will hopefully be sitting in my room (or Megan's room, or Hannah's room) thinking about where the past 4 years went? I will be pulling out my outfit for the next morning's May Day event and will more than likely be fighting back some tears.

Wow. This year has gone by so quickly. My roommate and I were just discussing the things that we did last semester and were shocked. How fast time goes. How quickly we try to keep up with the things, events and people around us. Sometimes it's nice to just sit and laugh.

I apologize for this months Blogs. I will already tell you that they will be emotional... there will be a lot of "remember whens" and a lot of "Bluffton changed my life." I am preparing myself--- so I wanted you to do the same.

I've been writing this blog since my freshman year of college. I can actually remember sitting on my red futon in Bren-dell with Hannah and Mary thinking about what I wanted to say. Thinking about my busy days and what it was I wanted to talk about. Looking back--- they were all great things. They are what made my Bluffton experience what it is today!-

So-- enjoy the rain, sun, warmth, and or chilly weather that you are having.
There is to be a storm tonight-- I love storms. (Sorry dear Megan--I know you hate them)

Blessings of Peace,

Only a few more of these from me--- what a strange thing to say.